Saraband
2003

萨拉邦德

Saraband (Original Title)

影片分10个小节讲述自与约翰分手已有30年后,玛丽安隐约感到约翰还需要她,于是她决定到约翰乡下的家里去看望这个别了30年的老男人。他过着富足但与世隔绝的生活,在两个人之间,尽管很多年过去,当初的情感依然非常真实。在那里,玛丽安认识了约翰与前妻的儿子恩里克,以及恩里克21 岁的女儿卡琳娜,他们住在离约翰家不远的地方,但这老少三代人似乎并不和谐...

2003年12月1日

我开了340公里的车,才找到你藏身的这片森林,现在我见到你,吻了你,说了话,我可以走了。
I drove 200 miles...and managed to find your lair deep in the forest. But now that I've seen you, kissed you, and spoken to you, I can go.

一位老牧师告诉我,“美满的婚姻必须有两个要素:真诚的友谊和强烈的情欲。”
An old priest once told me that a good relationship between a man and a woman has two components: a good friendshipand unshakable eroticism. 

我们一辈子都在思考死亡、死后会怎样,结果却这么简单,我能看见音乐中闪烁的光芒,比如巴赫。
We spend our entire lives wondering about death...and what comes after this. And then it's this easy. In music I sometimes get just a glimmer. Like with Bach.

我不是伤心,是来自地狱的剧痛,它比我更强大,从我身体的每一个孔钻出来,从我眼里、肛门里...就像精神上的疯狂腹泻,与这剧痛相比我太渺小了。
I'm not sad. It's worse. It's some hellish anxiety. It's bigger than me. It's trying to push its way out through every orifice...my eyes, my skin, my asshole. It's like a gigantic, total mental diarrhea! It's coming out everywhere. I'm too small for my anxiety.

我一直很好,一切都井井有条,可能有点寂寞,我不知道,有时...我会想到安娜,我想知道她是怎么生活的,她怎么说话,怎么走路,她的样子,她那超越现实的微笑,安娜的感情,安娜的爱。
Things are as always with me. In good order. Everything in its place. Perhaps I'm a bit lonely. I don't know. Sometimes... I think about Anna. I wonder how she managed her life. How she spoke...how she moved. Her gaze...that almost imperceptible smile. Anna's feelings. Anna's love.

我回來后,去了疗养院看我女儿玛塔,我想到生命这个谜,我今生第一次,意识到...感觉到,我在抚摸我的女儿,我的孩子。
When I got back, I visited my daughter Martha at the home. And I thought...about the mysterious fact...that for the first time in our life together...I realized...I felt...that I was touching my daughter. My child.

那是一个...疏远的夜晚,安娜在沉睡,我倾听着她的呼吸,我看着她,路灯从窗户照进来,我长久地凝视着她,想知道她是否真的明白,我有多爱她,我和安娜互相有归属感,不知你明不明白,能相互拥有是一种...奇迹,听起来很狂妄,但很准确。
It turned into a night of...a night of distance. Anna fell sound asleep...but I lay awake, listening to her breathing. I watched her in the light from a streetlamp outside the window. I gazed at her for a long time...and wondered if...deep down inside...she knew how much I'd grown to be a part of her. Or actually... how much she'd grown to be a part of me. With Anna and me, it was a question of belonging.You understand what I mean? And that belonging was...a miracle. I know that sounds pretentious...but there's no better word.

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